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Saturday, October 15, 2011

Brian's Home.....

I'm finding it really interesting how shit is just coming out da woodwork and findin my ass.  I don't profess to be a madd sexy bruh.  I ain't gon lie.  I think I'm fairly attractive, and have sexy moments.  I feel like I could be in better shape, but fukk, a nigga workin on it.  Doin the best I can with what I got.  FUKK YA'LL BUFF, CUT, IN SHAPE, GYM BITCHES!!

Digressed.....OOPS.

Anywho......I am often shocked that a nigga is gettin so much attention lately.  The last couple of years have really been interesting.  It's funny to hear a nigga say shit like, "Nigga I been wantin yo ass for years", or "I been tryna get your attention for a minute now".  My favorite is, "Nigga, if u weren't married....."

I'm just amazed at all the fuss folks are makin over my silly ass.

So, I get a phone call a couple of days ago.  It's from a number I don't recognize.  Now lemme say that with my bills and credit (shyt got all fukked up in my whack ass marriage to Gargamel), I don't just answer calls from random numbers.  Don't wanna talk to the same bill collectors all fukin day.  I didn't answer the phone.  Shit rang again......Same number.  After about two or three times of this same bullshit, I picked up the phone PISSED.  Mouth hit the floor when I heard who it was.

"Nigga, calm the fukk down.  And why did it take you so long to pick up the phone?"  It was Brian (from My First Time.....).  Brian was the first dude I ever dealt with.  First nigga to suck my dick.  First nigga to bust with.  First piece of ass I ever had.  I decided to go to UNC partially cause dat nigga was there.  But shit.  We graduated and he left the country and got ghost. It had been a few years.  Brian had been working for a major Italian marketing firm and just fukkin disappeared.  Every now and then I would get a letter or a post card with a pic.  But that was it.  I was shocked.

Anyway, I didn't recognize his number because it was a local ass phone number that I didn't know.  "Brian, are you in town on a visit??"

"Nah nigga, I'm back home.  I live here now.  Been here for about a month.  Everybody I used to hang out with is gone.  I was wonderin if you might have some time to fit a brutha in every now and then for a drink or somethin."

Da FUKK!!!!!  Shocked and nervous all at the same time.  I wasn't sure what to do.  How did he look?  How do I look since he's seen me?  Would I still feel some kinda way about him?  Would he about me??  Does he just want a buddy to chill with or does he have other intentions?  What are my intentions?  Can I just hang with him and not catch feelings??  WHY DA FUKK AM I TRIPPIN?

I couldn't do it.  "Nah man.  I gotta lot of shyt goin on right now.  No time for happy hours or hangin out. (LIED LIKE SHYT) I'm sorry."

We have a date tomorrow night.


DAMMIT!!  WHERE DA FUKK IS MY WILL POWER?????  Time for a smoke.







Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Black guys banging

Lovin this one.  Enjoy.

Black guys banging: Black guys banging

Reuben and Brian....

I am finding that the older I get, my sexual appetite is increasing.  Seems like I always wanna fuck.  I fuck longer now.  After I nutt, I'm ready to fuck again.  The shyt is crazy.  Don't get it twisted, a nigga ain't complaining.  I just noticed that shit is outta control.  And I'm not gonna be sittin at home beatin my dick everyday.  Da Fukk!!

Anyway,  I met this couple two summers ago.....two cute ass fellas.  One is Cuban.  Reuben, a lil dark skinned cutie with dreads.  Phat lil booty and juicy lips.  Sexy as fukk.

The other, Brian, is a brutha.  Light skinned.  Just an exotic, sexy lookin muufukka.  Stocky, muscular nigga, covered in tatts.  Ya'll know how a nigga feel about tattoos on a nigga.  Brian has thick thighs, a phat ass, and a big ole piece.

I met them at a birthday party I went to one Summer.  We kicked it together the entire evening.  Decided to exchange information, and have stayed connected ever since. 

Well, recently, we were having drinks at their apartment.  Chillin, listening to music, talkin shit, and of course, smokin up some shit.  I was really startin to feel some kinda way.  Reuben was in a pair of shorts and a wife beater.  Brian's old cocky ass had on a pair of warmup...fallin down to reveal that phat ass.  And of course, no shirt.  Nigga loves to show off.

We were all pretty "nice" after a few j's had been smoked and drinks/shots had been consumed.  So, I decided to test the waters and see what would happen.  Reuben was sitin right next to me, practically on my lap.  I reached over and started rubbing his inner thigh.  That Spic fukked around and told me "Don't start what you ain't tryna finish." I laughed.  Didn't that nukka know I was rubbin on his thigh with plans to dig in that ass???  Reuben leaned over and started kissing me on my neck and pinching my nipples.  My shit instantly got hard.  Brian's ass pulled out his 10" pipe and started strokin, and biting his lip.  That shit is stll sexy.

Before I knew it, Reuben had stripped, was slobbin on my dick, and had his ass cheeks wrapped round Brian's lips.  Dayum.  Seem like a nigga did that shit in one swift move.  Sexy ass Cuban was suckin the shit outta my pipe.  I was in heaven.  By this time, Brian had pulled that damn anaconda out, and was diggin Rueben's hole out.  When Brian asked me if I wanted some of that ass, I felt a nutt about to come.  I told Rueben to lemme spit dat shit on his chest or somethin.  BITCH DIDN'T MOVE!!  He stayed on the dick and sucked my shit dry.  Got every last bit of cum outta the dick.  I was smilin like a faggot in a store fulla dicks.

Anyway, a nigga gettin sleepy.  So I will have to finish this one later.  Needless to say, we fuck around a couple of times each month.  Those niggas are my dawgs.  Many stories to tell.


Nite

Friday, October 7, 2011

Trapped With Her....Driven to Him, Fo Real....

I've spent the last couple of weeks trying to figure out how to jump back into these updates.  I wasn't sure how to bring you up to speed on where I've been, and what's been goin on.  Should I do a couple of entries that just sum all of my shit up in a couple of nutshells?  Do I go back and try to create moments that have passed and possibly lose some detail?  Finally, I decided, fuck it!  I've been gone a minute.  Now I'm back.  Just gonna do what I normally do.  Pick da fukk up from where I left off.  If niggas got questions, ya'll will mos def ask.  Buncha nosey bitches.


Over the past few months, I tried to reach out to Gargamel.  I decided that it was time to have some peace in my home.  I was tired of fightin with her silly ass, and the shit was wearing us all da fukk out.  My oldest son, at one point, asked me to try and work shit out with "mom" so I wouldn't have to leave.  That shit fukked me up.  Here I was ready to give Gargabitch the finger and roll, and my youngin is beggin me to stay.  I know there are about a million schools of thought on this marriage/separation/divorce shit.  Some say more harm is done to the kids when you stay and shit is fukked up.  All I know, is that my eldest is in a season where he feels like he needs me here.  So that shit was a no-brainer.

So I sat the bitch down and told her that I didn't want our family destroyed, and was willing to do what we needed to do to salvage shit.  Apologized for hurting her and making her feel like she wasn't my wife.  Laid that shit on thick.  I was tryin to do what I thought was right.  Even if my emotions had to eventually catch up to what I 'thought' might be the right thing, a nigga was tryin to take the high road.

That's just what the fukk I get for tryin to get along with her ass.  Because after a few short weeks of peace and civility in the house, we go back to the same shit.  I'm not blaming her for everything.  But I can't force a bitch to be happy.  I can't manipulate her mind so that she is pleased at least most of the time.  Most days she comes in lookin to start some shit.  And if I'm not here, she starts on the kids until I get here.  Da Fukk??  I've decided that one way or another, a nigga is gonna have some peace.  Not gonna be fighting everyday.  Not gonna continue to lose sleep.  Carl has me on some new meds that has my ass sleepy all the damn time.  I gotta take advantage of that shit. 

At the end of the day, I have decided to stay as long as I can take it, for my kids.  May not be the best decision, but it is the decision today.  May change tomorrow.  But for now, I will be civil towards Gargamel.  I'll check her ass when I have to.  But my youngins need me.  And you know what?  I fukkin need them.  They are all I have to look forward to each day. 



I still have to deal with the fact that I want a brutha to lay with (more often now).  Somehow, I will have to find a way to make all of this shit work, even though the preacher in me is screaming, "Nigga, What the fukk are you doin????"  Maybe one day the shit will get easier to handle.  Right now, I just take it a day at a time.  Not sure what tomorrow will look like.  But I know one thing.  This is my reality for now.  Today I choose to stay Trapped With Her....Driven to Him.

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

It All Started With An Appointment...Part 2

Short post tonight.  I went back to Carl's office for my followup appointment.  The discomfort I was having all seemed to be gone, and I was feeling better.  But I still needed to know what the results were of those damn ultrasounds.  That shit was painful and aggravating.  From the nasty ass shake I had to drink, followed by that camera shoved up my ass, to the Asian urologist that took about 35 pictures of my muufukkin balls, a nigga felt violated. 

Anyway, after all of that shit, I got a phone call this morning from Carl.  All of the test results are normal. No cancer anywhere.  Just an infection that has been taken care of.  I was scared to death.  But this shit has made me think about how little we think about shit until it gets to our front door.  I'm glad to be healthy, but I'm definitely feeling for all of those whose shit came back with different results.